First Response Guide

1. Listen calmly, without judging or scolding.
2. Believe and take seriously what you hear or observe.
3. Do not interrogate or ask for details: what the student wants to say is enough.
4. Do not leave a student alone if there is risk.
5. Do not promise secrecy. Explain that, to keep them safe, you need to ask for help from those who can give it.
6. Write down what you observed and the exact words, without interpreting.
7. Tell the counseling team or the school leadership right away.
8. Activate the institution's protocol (see the school's Resource Map). If the school does not have a protocol yet: tell the counseling team and the school leadership, and use the contacts in the Resource Map (health service, child protection agency, emergency services). While it prepares its own, the school can start from RMU's Model Institutional Protocol.

And afterwards: care for whoever stepped in. The team meets to support one another. These situations also affect adults.

Thoughts of taking their own life. Signs: says they want to die or "not be here anymore" (even as a joke), writings or posts with that content, goodbyes, giving away their things. First response: ask directly, "Are you thinking about taking your own life?" (asking does not plant the idea: it opens the door to talking). Do not leave them alone: walk them to the counselor yourself. The counselor or another qualified professional assesses the risk, following your district's protocol. Do not give opinions or information about methods. Respond without alarm or scolding, and stay with them until the counselor takes over. If the risk is immediate, emergency services.

Self-harm. Signs: cuts, burns or marks with no clear explanation, long sleeves even when it's hot, hiding their arms or legs. First response: respond calmly, without horror, without scolding and without asking them to show the wounds. If there is a wound, first aid. Do not assume they do it "to get attention": it is a way of bearing something that hurts. Also ask whether they have thoughts of taking their own life. Do not promise secrecy, and tell the team.

Sexual abuse or maltreatment. Signs: a disclosure, injuries with no clear explanation, fear of going home, sexual behavior not expected for their age. First response: say, "You did the right thing by telling me. It is not your fault. I am going to get help to keep you safe." Do not interrogate, do not examine their body, do not take photos, do not confront the person named. In Florida, the duty to report is yours: call the Florida Abuse Hotline (1-800-962-2873) right away, even if you are not certain. You do not need proof, only reasonable cause to suspect. School staff must give their name when reporting. Telling the counselor and school leadership is also necessary, but it does not replace your own report.

Grief and death in the community. First response: give clear, careful information, without unnecessary details. Open spaces for the group to talk. Pay special attention to those who were close. If the death was by suicide: do not describe the method or present it as a way out, and follow the institution's postvention protocol.

Peer violence and threats. First response: separate and protect those involved, lower the tension, do not humiliate or expose anyone. Every threat is taken seriously, including those that appear on social media.

Bullying or cyberbullying. First response: listen to the person on the receiving end without blaming them. Do not ask them to show or forward screenshots or images, and do not forward them yourself. Do not confront those doing it in public. Tell the team.

Grooming or the sharing of intimate images. Signs: an adult or someone older who contacts them through social media or online games, gives them gifts, asks for photos or asks them to keep secrets; or an intimate image of them that is circulating. First response: listen without blaming (the person who asks for or shares the images is responsible, never the child). Do not ask for, look at, save or forward images. Ask them not to delete the conversations. Tell the counselor and school leadership right away. If you suspect the child is being abused, the duty to report to the Florida Abuse Hotline (1-800-962-2873) is also yours.

Substance use. First response: if there are signs of intoxication, medical attention. Do not lecture or expose them in front of the group. Listen to what is going on.

Acute distress (panic). First response: take the student to a quiet place and stay with them. Speak softly, breathe slowly together, do not force them to talk. If it does not ease or there are intense physical symptoms, medical attention.

Dating violence. Signs: someone who controls their phone or clothing, intense jealousy, someone who pulls them away from their friends, fear of their partner's reaction, injuries. First response: listen without judging the relationship or pressuring them to end it. Name that control and jealousy are not a form of love. Tell the team and, if there is risk, activate the protocol.

Eating behavior. Signs: skipping meals or eating very little, marked changes in weight, excessive exercise, frequent comments about their body, going to the bathroom right after eating. First response: talk in private from concern about how they are doing, not about weight or food. Do not comment on their body or monitor what they eat. Tell the team, which decides how to inform the family. If there is fainting, dizziness or weakness, medical attention.